The Star Treatment

In case you didn't hear, an employee of Victoria's Secret is reporting that Britney Spears came in a couple of days ago looking for some red thongs. I'm not sure how thong underwear works with a pregnant belly, but maybe she was buying them for her grandmother or something. So Britney gets to the register, pays for her items, smells a stinky one, and lays her baby on the floor next to the register, changes his diaper, and then shoves the dirty diaper at the woman behind the register who, thankfully, refused to take it from her.

Come on now, Britney. Seriously? If you're gonna do that, you might as well go all the way. You should have changed the diaper on TOP of the register, grabbed one of those overpriced negligees and used it as a baby wipe, smushed the dirty diaper in the cashier's face when she refused to take it, exacted revenge on the cashier's by contracting a hitman to snuff out her family and friends, taken the employees of Mrs. Field's Cookies hostage and sacrificed the baby to the gods of the Snickerdoodle, burned down the Orange Julius stand, declared herself the Empress of Rome, and used the public bathroom and left pee on the seat. Gross!

I'm just sick and tired of people under-using their celebrity status.

Maggie