"_______ing with The Stars!

Great news! "Dancing with The Stars" has spawned a rip-off show called "Skating with Celebrities"! I know what you're thinking, and I have to agree that the name is pretty creative, too. I don't understand why they didn't just call it "Dancing with The Stars On Ice". I guess THAT would be STUPID. Thank goodness they took the high road. Be that as it may, one can only hope that this is just the beginning of "Dancing with The Stars" rip-offs. I've put a few emails in to a few network executives with the following show ideas:

1. "Clubbing Baby Seals with The Stars" - I think this one would be an excellent vehicle for celebrities who want to project that husky, manly image in order to quell any of those pesky "Friend of Dorothy" rumors. Cast should include Clay Aiken, Tom Cruise, and Al Reynolds.

2. "Getting a Pap Smear with The Stars" - This is one is going to catch that highly-desired male 18-35 market. The "big twist" will be that all of the actresses cast are stars of The Golden Girls with vaginal dryness issues.

3. "Prison Sex with The Stars" - This one has a real "Oz" feeling to it, except that regular folks will be forced to have sex with James Brown, Nick Nolte, and Robert Downey, Jr. while chained to a toilet. The twist will be that you'll be stabbed with a sharpened spoon when you're voted off the show...well, that and the herpes.

4. "Going to The Freakin' Hott Show with The Stars" - Everyday people will go see The Freakin' Hott and I Am Stereo at Dada this Saturday, January 14th, alongside celebrities like Bobby J, The Sheffield Sisters, and That Guy Who's Dating Vanessa, as well as Petes of various ages, sizes, and sexual orientations! Show starts at 11pm.

Maggie