Livin' On Like a Prayer

There are few things that entertain me more than a good old-fashioned celebrity war. This week's war is Jon Bon Jovi versus Madonna. That's right. Not since the Rosie O'Donnell-Tom Selleck war a few years back has a celebrity war had the potential to get as ugly as this one. A lot of people will tell you that a woman is most beautiful when pregnant, but I am most beautiful when celebrities who don't even know each other engage in an argument via the press and we all get to sit back and laugh at their utter ridiculousness. Now don't get me wrong - if I were a celebrity, I would spend 23 and a half hours a day just trying to start fights with other celebrities. I consider this current fight just another round of training in my "How To Be An Asshole 101" class. As you can imagine, I am the teacher's pet. Now let's get to the gravy:

Jon said: "She can say what she likes but Madonna takes those kids out to every premiere she ever goes to. These kids have done nothing and yet we all know what they look like? It's crazy, man."

Madonna's side:

Madonna is defending her decision to include 9-year-old daughter Lourdes and 4-year-old son Rocco in her new documentary, "I'm Going to Tell You a Secret," which debuts Friday on MTV. The pop icon tells MTV that while she doesn't want to exploit her offspring, the film "would be a lie" if they weren't in it. "It's a fine line to walk," says Madonna, who explains that the footage with Lourdes and Rocco was filmed by a family friend, so "everyone was very comfortable. Honestly, they didn't even know the cameraman was there. They just sort of behaved as they normally do."

I can't wait to see how this one turns out. I'll update you if anyone gets so angry that their facelifts collapse or their hair extensions get pulled out.

Go see Catalonia at The Rose and Crown Pub in Ft. Lauderdale tonight. They's good people.

Maggie