Hanga Danga Doo!

Dear Kirsten Dunst,

Please put on a bra. I am begging you. I know you're trying to do some kind of Annie Hall thing, but it's just not working. I'll drive you to Sears and have the old lady in the lingerie department fit a nice, supportive brassiere for you. I'll even pay for it.

I am all for bra-lessness, but not in your case. It's all I can do to even barely notice your face or acting ability with those fleshy pendulums flapping around on your (visible) rib cage.

Please come to the last date of our Fiscal Responsibility Tour this Thursday at Dada and we'll sit down and have a chat about your boobehs. I'll bring snacks.

Maggie