Skank-Eyed Pea

We had a fantastic weekend, a great show Friday, and a fine day of ball-kicking yesterday. I thought things couldn't get any better until I found out late last night that Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas is getting in shape for her upcoming role as a stripper on The Sopranos. I suddenly pictured a streaky, rotting carrot being swirled around a germy-ass pole to the tune of "My Humps" and I immediately broke out into hives and went into convulsions until somebody showed me a new pair of pink and white polka-dotted heels, and the hives started to go down. It was hard to try them on while I was still convulsing, but a little old-fashioned determination seemed to do the trick just fine. For those of you who do not know, Fergie is actually Bret Michaels from Poison in quasi-drag.

Speaking of shoe fetishists, our fine webmaster is looking for graphic designers and other various webfolk. Here's the deal:

The freakin hott's web designer needs help. HAVE WORK. NEED
DESIGNERS: Graphic, Web, or Print. All, some, or one. Print: mostly
flyer design for local clubs and restaurants. MUST HAVE SAMPLES!!!
Email url's, PDF or JPG files to: neil@towntek.com.

And make sure you tell him Large Marge sent ya.

M