Look Sharp!

As I'm sure you know, we go through a lot of preparation before a big show. In this case, for our show at Revolution this Friday the 22nd in Ft. Lauderdale, even more preparation than usual. Thank goodness they put three massage chairs in The Sharper Image store at the mall so we can have all that pre-show tension worked out while discussing the pyrotechnics layout for the stage. The employees at The Sharper Image are top-notch, and only throw you out after the third time you try to take your pants off so you can get a "more intense" massage. And even then, you can just go to the Revlon wig kiosk around the corner, pick up a Sandra Dee #57 and saunter back in, and they're none the wiser.

And we're not just saying that because we want an endorsement deal with The Sharper Image so we can get our own massage chairs for the back of our well-fortified tour bus (code: hatchback coupe). It's just that we hate those bastards at Brookstone with a fiery, burning passion so much and will do anything to spite them. Try to tell ME to get out of your store because I used the solar-powered wine-uncorker/compass in an immoral way? Screw you, bucko!

Maggie